Log check?

Leaving milestone 2009 to start 2010 seems to be nothing but a change in he calendar for me this time round, many of the challenges has yet come to a siesta point, not to mention drawing to a end or even anywhere close bah...

Every year is a year of change, and now i know the year 2008 was really a pre-prep time for 2009, where dramatic changes occur... This day last year, i said " Come what may, i am ready..." And true enough, like pass ghosts they raised themselves back towards me, demanding true resolutions to issues... issues that were place aside on borrowed time. Passing of family and relatives, the estranged relationships with relatives, purpose of Life & living, switching careers etc... its more than a handful. Years before i was told i need to spare a thought for my family, then i was told i am selfish; there is so much i have to come to terms with, confront with myself before anything can be resolved. Even with 6 months gone, i guess only 1% is processing... i really do wonder if it can be successfully completed... Its going to take a pretty long while...

Something did slightly change this time, at least this time i have a list of things to be done this year with all signs of fulfilling it... Sincerity to the extend that plans has been made with specific time frames, reading up on psychology books... starting with psychology for dummies... LOL... dun wanna splurge money on something i cannot complete lah...

Not sure if i have changed or i will change, i'll leave it for ppl ard me to tell me... but i do want to stop struggling between choices, and having to make a "i can only choose 1 decisions". I'm not looking to be the me i was 10 years ago, i'm looking to be something even BETTER than that. I look forward to 2011.

Goodbye Doulos

"Doulos on her final journey" a headline that had caught me by surprised; It was a vessel where many of us dreamed of joining when we come to age. Sadly, it was forgotten the moment we graduated, as we scamper to look for a job which turned to career building. She is a one of a kind vessel, more than a floating bookstore, more than bringing literary to many parts of the world, it also carried hope and gospel to many in the days where iron curtains were raised in Russia, China and Vietnam. It was also a training ground for many youths, who learnt lessons that became part of them.

It was our Sec 3 days, where one of our assistant cell leader announced her absence for 6 months, as she was going to serve on board Doulos. And that was our first encounter with the vessel. The day before she sailed, she invited us to board the vessel and look around. It was a carrier of amazing stories and testimonies of how lives were changed in one way or another. For the young and bold, our cell were bursting with excitements. Little did we expect that, 4 years down the road all these were but smoke...

傻瓜走的路

A sudden moment of me sitting-in a meeting chairing by my sub-consciousness, gave me a little encouragement:

It was some nerves i had when i told God 2009 is the year where i was ready to have things to be resolved, where i was ready to face what i couldn't before. Things may seem worse now, but it really isn't . Before any wound can start to heal, it first has to be cleanse. Adding salt to wound may seem to be torturous, but its still a primitive cleansing and disinfecting methodology.

Many a times, there are many easier ways to do things painlessly and more effectively and this is no exception. I can no longer rem what happened in 2008 for me to recall for such bravery, opting for the salt treatment, but i do remember that this was the only way to truly resolve everything and not burying it in some forest and flee into another land.

It had been a torment since the day i ever played with the idea, but it was worth the resignation letter becos it was not simply make a move to change my working environment or a career move but dealing with with things that matters, allowing me to move on. I am still struggling, and wringing in pain, but its worth it.

Funerals

News of 2 funerals of distant relatives in a span of 3 days, alarmingly high...

My grandma's grief let lose everyone's tear gates, and my role was to keep the smiles and spirits high... once again, when the 4 of us gathers, we were like kids in single digit age.. :) 大哥 was slow but warmed up eventually, 二哥 is still the best cos he is always coming to my rescue when Chow bullies me... The 3 brothers all in their own ways, and are still our fav playmates in younger days and in these days where we all have already hit our thirties.

PS. DARN! 二哥's twin dotz called me 姑姑... :P

It really doesnt feel like Christmas......

AVATAR

After failing to catch the movie of choice, AVATAR was the obvious choice. I remembered tell a friend that this was an environmentalist movie, after catching its trailer @ GV Plaza. And i was right, but i did not expect to feel shaken after the movie.

I'm not going to tell u the story of the movie, cos u can watch it or read the synopsis... no point me writing about it... i'm not the writer of the script.

I do have to say the scale and the cinematography sent my mind racing between the Hanging Garden of Babylon & Garden of Eden. There is a storyline not that its not unpredictable, but with the graphics, it definitely grabbed our attention and glues our sight to the big screen. I see Nature vs Modern, one fighting to advance and the other fighting to keep and balance. The call for revolution to keep and protect the natural world, a big movie propaganda to go pro-environment.

Everything else was huge, to show how small humans are. They also show how destructive we are unless we convert ourselves to learn and live the ways the original humans who had began to live. The movie does scares me a little bit, religion scents are evident throughout... concepts of maintaining a balance is strangely similar to Ying and Yang in Taoism, then there is subtle note of environmentalist becoming a religion of it own. Remembering revelations in the bible, the one who unite the world might just very well be the chair person who uses environmental conservations as his winning tiles to gain respect and power from all...

This is a time of uncertain waters...

2009-11-22

一个人要振作几次才能真正的站起来？

一个人可以振作几次才能成功？

一个人又有几次的机会振作机会，几次的振作精力呢？

我已经不知道自己当初有的能耐到底是确实发生过的事， 或是个幻觉；

也不知道曾经的能耐是否还在。。。

虽然每次的绝境都由上帝意想不到地救赎，

但这一次有让我不断地从窗口往下看

幸福到底是什么？

是一家人出外同游还是两人甜蜜相处？

是饱足一餐还是一杯热乎乎的香浓咖啡？

是高回报率的工作还是拥有一般要好的工作伙伴？

是钱财多多还是青春永驻？

幸福会逗留多久， 它又何时会来？

会是天长地久或是十一分钟？

会长久不散或是不时出现？

会不会来了又走或是走了回不来？

会不会永远都不来或是自己不让它来？

幸福是真的吗？ 它到底存在吗？

你眼前的幸福是真实，还是虚构？

你眼里的幸福和大家一样吗，或是各有所别 ？

你眼看的幸福是是那本人的幸福吗？

你眼看到的 到底是幸福吗？

Guess what i saw in gumtree for sale…

 

Curious

 

SENT:

Hi... am very curious... and alittle too much time on my hand.
So wat do u do exactly?
U travelled ard, from one place to another.
Then u write songs... and u perform?
No offence, just curious.
Anyway, have a good trip to jap...
Hope all be well with you.

Ps. am waiting to read " 10 yrs of Xxxxxx Xxxx"

 

REPLY:

This is my transition year - was working in UNICEF in Geneva until January, and I will be starting my PhD next week in Tokyo.
I spent the year travelling, finishing the master's which i have been doing through distance learning since 2007, and also learning Korean which has been necessary for my research (my research topic is related to the country).
As for the music part - this has been what I have been doing on the side since about 10 years ago.

 

 

LATER ON SAW IN FB:

Xxxxxx Xxxx : if curious, check this place out. i am staying in building B of the residence halls. <URL>

 

 

Note:

Just tot it to be funny to see such coincidence in word use. Nothing more… jus for humor… akaka

Of stories and fairy tales

Once upon a time, there was a little girl who loved stories. Day in day out, she would pester her mum to bring her to the library, her favorite place. She was only 5.

I was that little girl who loved stories. I adored fairy tales, tales of creatures never seen, stories with twists and adventures, and endings were often happy ones. I remembered reading the entire series of fairy tales at my neighborhood library. Needless to say, my mum was impressed, but she never quite understood why i only loved fairy tales.

Then i moved on to bible stories, they were brilliant! It was as if they were fairy tales, but only they were true! The adults around all said that they were real life accounts. I was elated.

It has been many years, but my love for stories never went away. I have been reading, listening and participating in stories of the people around me. And that is truly my passion.

I stumbled onto a blog, its titled “ Stories that matters”. He too was searching for stories, travelling from one place to another, searching and writing the stories along the way. I am impressed; impressed in doing what he does, in continuing to do what he had began. Becos, i had stopped my search. I wanted to in my own story, and no longer in others only.

It seems like a task too difficult, i stopped struggling and feeling despair. But i am not ready to raise the white flag, not really sure what i am going to do now or how things will turn out… I am sure that i will not surrender and resign myself to compromise. I am trying to put away the recent spate of disappointments and unhappiness, the day i am able to speak to my father without coldness would be the day of my success.

Stories

BIG tots... abt "Stories to Tell - travelling tales for all". Then there is this big idea from reading Marien's novel; obsessions of individuals and their resolutions. Of cos, a novel has to have all her characters linked up... and it showed the good old wisdom of removing root before treatment and the price of a fool.

Read the book.







P.s Too much into the book, now in Marien Keyes's Loly Daly mood!

Sulky

its been quite a few days since i have been sulky, and more considering the days of despair.
One week, just one bloody week i gave myself to wallow and pretend i'm on holiday and relax... stayed offline and managed to stick to my book, no internet no tv and not really a huge progress. Nevertheless, still a step... big step for me.

One book down and quite a few more to go!

Scale of ignorance and power

If ignorance is bliss, then knowledge is power... power for change.

To be more specific,
knowledge is unrealized power,
waiting for the moment to evolve into revelation.
Revelation IS the power to be reckon with.

04:21

This moment is 04:21 or 21st September,
This moment came silently and unexpectedly;
I wasn't waiting for it,
nor had i paid any attention to it.
This moment just came, and froze...

Despair

Despair just eats you alive; it starts from taking in HOPE like someone slurping on their soup starters... licking every drop, polishing you from even a single speckle of anything that resumes HOPE. It moves on like a hungry wolf, pouncing on your senses. Losing your mind, bit by bit, little by little, like a prey completely subdued by its predator... waiting hopelessly, mindlessly for death to come.

Slowly, you will feel nothing, as if your nerves had been removed. You struggle and hurt yourself with intent, hoping pain pain can distract you, thinking feeling pain can wake you, using the pain to prove that you are still alive...

Pathetic.

你 我 他

 

Down you hung yr head, looking to the ground,
With every step you take, you allowed it to be your style.
Casting your glances up, only to see the signs and lifts
before returning back to the cold hard concrete down.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You were dressed in blue causal, in jeans with a sling bag as many youths would.
You were barely walking, dragging your feet in the pace of reluctance.
You were going in a direction for the train, leaving for some place called dread.
You caught the lift, finally glancing to see the numeric of 123.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

World I look you in the eye, with glances to the horizons.
Quicken but relaxed were my pace, for this day of light and glory.
Dressed in red blue and a bagful of hope I carry,
I dreamt of an unceasing hope.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am dressed in red blue, with a touch of white and cyan at the ears.
I walk with direction, and a sense of destination.
I quicken my steps, pacing in peace and relief from the weights of world.
I like to share this flora I wear, that brings colors to life and life to lives.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Love is all one can see, in the eyes of the he who is able and willing;
wearing that body of scars and stripes, from scourges not his.
Like a beacon in the night, he stands out for you and me.
In the name of an amazing love.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He was dressed with blood and scars, but now in white glory.
He was nailed on the cross, but resurrected alive and well.
He sits in Heaven, with eyes upon our every thought.
He is waiting for us, for us to make that call.

未來我得到的還會有很多， 但失去的，只有你一個。

 

徐佳瑩 失落沙洲

這首創作，是描寫『失去』的一首歌，細微地勾勒情感遠離的惆悵與心酸。一次一場探訪癌 症病童的活動，當時徐佳瑩和參訪者置身於小朋友、家屬和醫護人員中，氣氛熱絡溫馨，其 中一位護理長懇請她現場演唱之前比賽時表演過的「失落沙洲」，這首讓護理長聽了直落淚 的原因，是因為其中一段歌詞「我不是一定要你回來，只是當又把回憶翻開，除了你之外的 空白，還有誰能來教我愛。」深刻地唱出了那些失去孩子們的家長心聲，而這也讓徐佳瑩對 這首歌產生新的體驗。基於各種不同的感受交雜，「失落沙洲」是專輯裡演唱難度最高的一 首歌曲，「雖然初始動機是失去愛情，但在演唱時就會不斷想到那些，也許是失去親人，也 許是失去任何一些重要的東西的人，我貪心的希望它能包含更多的追憶。」
「失落沙洲」開場緩緩流動的弦樂一出，立刻領人進入一股緩慢的哀傷裡，沉靜中盡顯孤寂 ，極具渲染力。在陳建騏老師細細指引下，徐佳瑩以其圓潤清亮的聲線，完美詮釋歌曲中「 面對失去的悲傷」、與「接受失去的遺憾」的思緒轉折。

身骑白马

 

這首歌不但傳達了一個平凡女生義無反顧追 求愛情、追求夢想的勇敢與孤獨，也更像是徐佳瑩為了音樂勇往直前孤身北上的真實寫照。

 

 

我爱谁 跨不过 从来也不觉得错                                              自以为 抓着痛 就能往回忆里躲偏执                                       相信着 受诅咒的水晶球 阻挡可能心动的理由  

而你却 靠近了 逼我们视线交错                                              原地不动 或向前走 突然在意这分钟                                        眼前 沙弥漫了等候 耳边传来孱弱的呼救                                 追赶要我 爱的不保留  

我身骑白马 走三关 我改换素衣 回中原                                            放下西凉 无人管 我一心只想 王宝钏  

而你却 靠近了 逼我们视线交错                                              原地不动 或向前走 突然在意这分钟                                       眼前荒沙弥漫了等候 耳边传来孱弱的呼救                               追赶要我 爱的不保留

我身骑白马 走三关 我改换素衣 回中原                                            放下西凉 无人管 我一心只想 王宝钏  

满身伤痕累累也来不及痛 那是指引我走向你的清楚感受                    不管危不危险 都要放下一切跟你走                                                 只要一起承担 只要你不放手

ENFP - The Inspirer

 

You are lucky because you are good at a variety of different things. In general you are successful at things you are interested in, however you do have a tendency to get bored easily and sometimes don't follow things through to completion. You should avoid jobs involving detailed, routine tasks and focus of careers where you have the freedom and flexibility to be creative and interact with other people. You have natural leadership skills without the need to always be in charge. This coupled with your creativity and energy allows you to inspire others and make them willing to work with you. Some of your personality traits include: * Project-oriented * Bright and capable * Warmly, genuinely interested in people; great people skills * Extremely intuitive and perceptive about people * Able to relate to people on their own level * Service-oriented; likely to put the needs of others above your own * Future-oriented * Dislike performing routine tasks * Need approval and appreciation from others * Cooperative and friendly * Creative and energetic * Well-developed verbal and written communication skills * Natural leaders, but do not like to control people * Resist being controlled by others * Can work logically and rationally - use your intuition to understand the goal and work backwards towards it * Usually able to grasp difficult concepts and theories Some of your suggested careers are: * Consultant * Psychologist * Entrepreneur * Actor * Teacher * Counselor * Politician / Diplomat * Writer / Journalist * Television Reporter * Computer Programmer, Systems Analyst, or Computer Specialist * Scientist * Engineer

Sick Meow

Its been a really long time since i fell ill with fever, thanks to tonsil inflammation! Actually, its my fault lah… had herbal chicken on the same day with roasted pork knuckles, grilled sausage platter and charcoaled pizza… wheat beer from Paulaner seems to make it worse (according to an unverified source). Waking up hourly for water and washing of face to cool myself down was damn tiring, but the discomfort was worse… I’m just glad that i am feeling so much better now.

Was going thru the fridge, to find an apple and a packet of Taiwanese sausages. A moment of brainstorm jumped on me! i made porridge with diced apple and sausages, some seasoning and it turned out not too bad… Hee… Cooking is certainly is one of my fav hobbies… cooking without restrictions and supervision !

Tour guiding experience

Well, as many know that i had to rush to Hanoi on the 6th August to participate in my first tour guiding experience. Its very informal, after all it was an experiment mah…

They were a grp of 4 ladies, delighted am i when i they said i was the youngest amidst them. :) The foursome are quite different, and they came together rather interestingly. Of these four, i only know Teri… she was one of the jie mei i got to know @ estee’s wedding. She got in touch w me, informing me that they will be going Hanoi and i took the chance to play tour guide.

First, i did up a schedule… the items were all in, and the time allocated were quite realistic. One big challenge was i shldnt have gave them options, where alot of amendments had to be made. I shld have been firm. We did cover all the places, but i think i really died in shopping. The weather was killing me, and i think i was too hot for my tolerance to maintain functional.

It was a great trial, cos i felt i did try out something and learnt something… I do have another trip to plan, for my good buddy and her parents! So, this time round i doing up a budgeting for her first, then advise her on the date of my preference. It shld be exciting!

[Hanoi – ing] You must be joking!

God’s favor upon me is like the air that we breathe daily; this trip to Hanoi has not only allow me to have a very minimal tasting of tour guiding, but also allowed me to do major networking and socializing with other Singaporeans here. Of which were the Singapore ambassador for Hanoi, Hungarian ambassador (cant rem of their names :X), Bobby who owns a western dining place which i will definitely visit before i leave, Halia representative where they do up class/fine dining in the paragon area of Hanoi, ppl from an educational centre who asked me i i am interested to do teaching with them…. etc

Er…. ya they must be joking! Me to teach A maths, physics, etc?!! They happily wanna squeeze one class out for me to do trial teaching, and i had beads of perspiration streaming down at the back of my head. Some time later, another asked me if i am interested to teach young children, and i am suspecting the young children refers to her cutie daughter… Yes, boo boo finally accepts me and we are having lotsa fun together, but nannying/baby sitting or tutoring her is a diff story altogether; the fear of letting them down is like the end of the world.

Thanks but no thanks… dun think teaching is for me, i find the email from calvary making more sense at the moment…

My 2009 National Day experience

Its been a pretty tiring time for me, in the last few days, but tdy has got to be something to blog abt… Help yourselves to the point form events, cos i really no energy to tahan b4 i fall zzz again…

• Golf with Dad and Hilman @ 0500hrs, barely slept and had to wake up le!
• On the way to golfing, saw a crowd and realized an accident had just occurred; a young man lying on the ground with his back facing us… in a pool of red blood… his own blood… Really freaked me out and on the spot i gave up any ideas of riding or driving in Vietnam ever!
• At golf, the heat was melting me as if i was an ice cube. More heat was felt when my Dad kept commenting on the way i prep/play. Hilman felt more buay tahan than me… GRIN
• On the way back, Hilman gave me tips on stocks and shares and if i wan i really got to quick quick…
• Lunch was chicken briyani, mutton briyani & Tandoori Chicken! Yummy!
• Dad had to nap, Hilman had hsechores and i was trying to proof read for someone but ending up zzz too…
• Another National Day dinner to attending, organized by the Singaporean business association… Met the Ambassador again, v friendly and approachable guy so far.
• Enjoyed the National Day Parade live telecast, with doing the pledge @ 2022hrs and singing the anthem. Had a few tigers and head for another round of japan food…
• Finally back in Ciputera… feel like i falling apart…

Got more to write but really buay tahan le…. BBL

Dun feel good day

Panadol extra came in handy today, the familiar headache made a surprise visit and i can feel my ears burning hot again… Cant really tell if all these were from the pouring rain from the typhoon visiting Hanoi or was it from the glasses of wine and non-stop introduction as Mr KB Lim’s daughter, eldest daughter.

Met alot of ppl, some exchange if name cards took place, and of cos my dad was proud to introduce me to the Singapore ambassador, whom he kept stressing as young handsome and capable.   – . -    You know i dun like to carry a tag that says “so & so” daughter, the ballroom was sucking life outta me…

Heard something that i would like not to hear; something confirming my fears which i cannot do anything but plan to run away to some other parts of the world, feeling tired of being a egg mayo filling.

Dun understand why dad and Hillman so enthu abt watching Money Not Enuff II movie once we came back from the red white dinner; Its kinda funny, but it reminded me alot of my grandma. I rem the exact scene where i saw my grandma lying motionless on the hospital bed. Sadly, we could relate to many of the ending scenes from my grandpa’s passing and my recent grandma’s demise.

I guess i am too exhausted from such a long day, looking forward to visit fren in Sydney and maybe hiding in NZ or xxx…

G.o.o.h

 

Concealed is the glow, beneath the dry sticks and leaves

Brewing in the skies, and stirrings in the winds

A fire awaits the bursting of flames,

consuming everything that stands in its ways.

** COKE

Enough horsing ard with the facebook apps, i shld be getting straight to biz and do up the tasks at hand. But i think i shld let off some steam before the pressure eats me alive. There are many wonderful things to blog abt;

- The time in Hanoi, a different feeling/mood.

- The unexpected surprise Nanning gave me.

- The importance of  moving on constantly, and improving/developing myself.

- Freedom is something everyone wants, and all are looking to escape from their unsatisfied life/lifestyle… and that includes my parents…

Then there is the unexpected twist in Lian and Ting’s situations, not to mention Fang’s possibility in changing the heading of her course… which so far is the best news :)

But the thing that drove me to Mac for a upsized coke and wireless SG to blog is none other than my head almost turning into a pressure cooker that is cooking my brains and eating me alive.

I rem once upon a time my addiction to CocaCola drove my family nuts, and family frens were rallied into tell me their life stories on coke addiction. Maybe it was that time, my reliance on cocaine developed bah… ok lah… now i only taking small dosage of it in panadol extra :X  just kidding… hee…

After resigning, i am subjected to stay home and not run anywhere rule, by order of Mrs Lim. Then i have to subject my time and schedule, my plans to Mr Lim… who doesnt seems to have a clue what he wants me to do… He gave 2 tasks, but with incomplete information to properly execute anything. No problem, we handled such situation everyday in the last 9 yrs. I took it in my stride and did whatever i could, pacifying and fighting fire as we go along.

But what he did last night really upset me, i dun mind if you have no plans for me. I was the one who resigned, so if u think this is a mess, then i will settle this mess myself. I am not waiting for handouts of tasks to do to survive.

I told my fren i made a choice, and i intend to keep it. Since i will not go US/Aussie/anywhere, unless i have your blessings. But at least let me do what i want to do in Sg. I can plan for myself. Yes, i may be confused and lost right now, but i believe after sorting out i will figure something out

Someone asked me why do i have to be right all the time, do the right thing, make the right choice, why this mentality? Becoz my own family dun tolerate failure or mistakes, for every mistake or wrong or failure it will be stuck to me forever and my family will bite on it never letting it. Now i dun want to let go of my past failures, is they keep reminding me.

Home is suppose to be a place of rest and comfort, but blk 133 is more of a pressure chamber to me right now.

 

I need another coke.

Not doing anything vs initiative vs rash

Someone once praised me for having initiative and even said that i will amount to some great thing, he was dead sure.

Now i am not that sure any more. I cant put my finger one me being initiative or being rash. Somehow i began to feel that i am either on the not doing anything part of the scale or the other extreme end of rash… Many talked abt mine impatience, rather than initiative. When i took my time to consider, they said that i am not doing anything, and even deem that i am lost.

In the midst of making decisions, i rarely care what ppl say, but it was the aftermath comments that really get to me. Its fine if ppl dun see the way i see, or agree with my ways. I dun need to you to understand me, but i really dun need your accusations.

In our final episode of “ The Land of Thousand Scams ”

Today is the 8th July 2009, weather in Bangkok has been unpredictable with showers of rain getting heavier towards the end of our 4Ds 3Ns Bangkok escapade; where it also marked the end of an expensive educational experience. Shall i share my experience?

Lesson 1: Greed is dangerous.

Lesson 2: Learn to live by the peace that in within myself.

Lesson 3: Getting upset and worrying does not help.

Lesson 4: Ask for help, do not hesitate.

Lesson 5: Everyone rest on public holidays, including the Thai Police.

Lesson 6: Need to have a bigger heart to live in the world today.

Lesson 7: There are good and not so good ppl everywhere, Thailand is not the only place with scams.

Lesson 8: Once the heading is determined, be firm.

Lesson 9: Respect myself. Cannot everything also never mind; have to be accountable to ppl, also must accountable to myself… cannot ignore myself all the time… no wonder i am always upset with myself…

Lesson 10: Citibank in different countries are like different banks in different countries. International bank? BLEAH!

Lesson 11: Cash deposit Machines in Citibank Bangkok cannot read Citibank Cards issued by Citibank Singapore. Even manual deposit is complicated; Needs a receipt to show where the money for deposit comes from/payslip, Need exact address of Bank and branch in singapore with SWIFT code, etc….

PUBLIC HOLIDAY AGAIN?!!!

Touched down on sunday morning and all the cab drivers and tuk tuks have been telling me that this whole week is holiday, and my first tot was : “WTF… everyday is holiday in BKK ah!”

After failing to make contact with the government offices and embassy yesterday, it was my plan to march down to their office tis morning. However, i was prompted to continue to call this morning again, before i raze their grounds. Still, no one is answering calls… Sigh… thai side not responding to phone call is not that surprising, but Sg Embassy?!! Sigh… Sg Embassy has nv sat well with me, they nv ever offer real help to the Sg citizens since my first overseas trips…

Anyway, before is set off, i was prompted to ask the reception abt depositing money to CitiBank. I was surprised to find out that i can only bank in Baht cash at the 1 and only Citibank office in Bangkok. Then they told me that today is a special day, and becos of this special day, its public holiday since Monday all the way to Wednesday… Many offices are closed till Thursday morning. Only some banks will be resuming operations on Wednesday morning. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oki… that explains the DIT office and Sg Embassy not responding… but still… argh… So, Plan B was to make a police report after lunch and get the scammers to come down the police station to settle the issue… it seems to be a safer option than going down the scamming territory… And so the journey began…

It took me 30mins to try locate a nearest bank for me to do money order to Sg, so i wun have to worry carrying much cash with me. Then only to realize no banks are doing money orders unless its their HQ,… no choice, i decided to just go to the police and bank in the money on wed morning @ the Citibank HQ. Thai ppl are very nice, but all the direction giving were nt exactly accurate and i ended up walking round and round for an hour before locating the bloody police station.

Stepping in, the thai police was extremely not good in english and keep taking my map and looking at dunno wat… unable to communicate, he brought me to a nearby counter where more ppl were… a few ppl went in and another few man came out… finally they managed a few words of english… and those were this :" Public holiday, closed… thursday open… come back on thurs…”

WTF #!$#%^&*^%$#@$%^&*(&^ The Royal Thai Police HQ is closed, the Tourist Police is closed, ALL CLOSED TODAY! What in the world is this?!! Police is close on public holiday?!! POLICE IS A BUSINESS OPERATION AH!!!! CLOSE ON PUBLIC HOLIDAY?!! WOW LAU EH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ANGRY LEH!!!!! WHERE GOT LIKE TAT DE!!!!!!

I have decided now, tmw i will take a cab down to the scamming shop, with my mum in cab, waiting outside… i will go in myself to get the bloody money back! WTF… police is another business trade here in bangkok, indeed this is the land of scams… i’m sorry… shld be LAND OF SCAMMERS!!! cos police is their support division!

But really thank God that he prompted me to keep making calls and put off going down the office personally; The DIT office is far and secluded, and it might be a problem trying to get back to hotel or civilization. Thank God that i no make waste trips to the Embassy, cos the area might just as well be a dead town when the banks and commercial area are closed.

Toda Raba Yahwah… Toda!

Almost wanna give up

I think i almost wanna let it go, but coming tis far to Bangkok and leaving empty handed was definitely something i cant account to myself… In feeling bad, i decided to do a more thorough research…

Seems like no choice have to go a few places, and it doesn't necessarily include going down to the remote DIT office, which is out of my Bangkok map… I am skeptical abt the Sg Embassy, but better than not trying…

Plan for 07 07 09:

1. Make report to Tourist Police, need document for Citibank for waive-ing of interest for the gem payments.
2. Singapore Embassy (Not sure go which one first though… maybe before go TA is a better idea?) Dunno tell them wat also… sigh…
3. If TA doesn't help us to contact Erawan Lapidary, or even to DIT… Depending on the time,if 3pm then i going to block hired a cab, so that he will wait for me outside, then after to Citibank to bank in the payment.
4. Go meet my dear mum for dinner.

i really wonder how smoothly all these will go… my heart is pounding by the second… even at this very moment…

GAMBATE!!!!!!!!

Project RunAway @ 30a

Hahaha... think the number 30 is really bothering me, bothering me to make a change from a life which makes me think of a 100 reasons to stay alive from the moment i wake up each day...

A life of uncertainty is also not easy... worries and fears are flooding me as if its a Noah ark's remake! Now, that i had taken the first step, i think i might as well let it loose… Let’s see where it leads me…

Stopover 01 - Bangkok

Ok, i think i rest my case... i'll stop calling Thailand the land of scams and scums, its not the entire country's fault that i am this predicament... Like my fren said, greed for easy money was our downfall...

So now, here i am in Citin Pratunam Hotel... on my bed... with my new lappy... no imaginations please... its just a all white scenery... NICE RITE! Alamak... i said scenery not in sanitarium lah...

Here's the big plan:

1. Call DIT see how they can help us and then see if need to go log report to tourist (dun think need bah).
2. Go breakfast with my mum, she deserves to be treated like a queen... maybe her majesty would like some dim sum ? hmm... i'll zzz on it
3. Escort her to Platinum Mall, and give her the hotel name card. Oh yeah, must make sure she bring her phone manz... before i leave for DIT, shld DIT is willing to help me out...
4. Go DIT. Log report. Meet Erawan Lapidary rep. GET BACK $.
5. Meet mummy for dinner.
6. Bring her go wash hair or see movie.
7. Back to hotel and rest.
8. Enjoy the 7th and 8th July 09.

Dear all u ppl who are reading, do pray for us...

1. For favor that DIT will want to help me, and grants me assistance without having to make another appointment on another time or another month etc.
2. May God come forth and get back the full 100% amount for me. (To be 100% frank, if its me alone to go get back $... i also worry i not able to get back any $ at all... sigh)
3. Protection and safety throughout the whole Bangkok trip and Vietnam trip, and all our travellings.
4. My mum's health... the travelling taking a toil on her, cos of not enuff zzz and her own medical conditions.
5. Pray that we will not meet any more scams, or lose anything or forget anything, nothing will be stolen or rob from us etc... completed divine protection from Yahwah.
6. Pray for me, for shalom and no scare. Perfect love cast out all fears! Amen?!! *deep breathe* i dun wanna drama or ugly situation 2 get back $... its no good for our soul and minds.
7. Pray for my mum to experience only happy and no sad or angry for this thai-viet trip.

* Abba,
all this i rest in yr hands...
May you bless and keep us,
in wholeness and safety,
from worry and fear,
from harm and deceit,
from sickness and diseases;
May yr grace and miracles follow us thru.
In Yahwah's name... Amen.

KEO GAMBATE DEUS !!!

Dearest fren,

Think going to miss you quite abit... and mostly likely will be stalking yr blog and yr facebook to see how you are doing... i look forward to praying for the both of us each day; rem the crossing over of 2007 and 2008? We both felt that things will be different, and look at us now... We've spent the last 2 crossing over together, not sure we'll have the chance to do so for the 3rd consecutive... but i am sure we will see other soon enough :)

Jia you and enjoy oki... u still complain to me via skype and webcam-ing... hee.... and i would still be yr no.1 audience and fan... :)

P.s U're more cool than S.H.E k.... : X hehehe

Durians

BURP~~~!!! ok… i really do feel like like i am pregnant with 4 whole durians in my tummy, with the husk and everything… Have to thank Mr Wu for the sumptuous buffet @ Cafe Vic, where durian is found in food that had never crossed my mind. Trust me, ever tried the DDF? Durian Duck Fusion … this is the best polite name i can come up with lah… Imagine as you bite into a Peking Duck Wrap that has creme of durian instead of the usual sweet sauce… SEE! FUSION LOR!

I have to say 1st prize goes to the Durian Crème Brulee Well, i love Crème Brulee  and i do like durian, and the union if perfect!!! 2nd prize goes to the shrimp wanton with thai sweet chilli sauce… it reminded me of the one i had in Hoi An – which was unforgettable! (Maybe its time to plan to go Hoi An again… CHEAP BEER AND YUM FOOD! hehehe)

Tummy check… Yup… still bloated!!!! Maybe i will stay away from durians for a while… hehehehe….

How changes come about?

I saw an interesting quote on the TV mobile, while on a bus heading home… It said :“ You move one when you are sick and tired of being sick and tired…” I cant say BRAVO for sure, but it did stick a pin to my ribs…

When you are young, the whole lot of ideals that you carry on your back din seem to have any weight… In fact, it was the more the merrier… all in waiting for age to come so that things can start happening. Then as you grew older, you realised that its no just age that has to be right, the greens in your pockets are the things that counts… those were the elements required before any action begins.

In the name of focus, all steams ahead to work for the light at the end of the tunnel… days passed, weeks passed, months passed, finally… years passed… Till one day, i wonder about my life’s purpose and why am i working like that? What did i want? I cant remember at all?!!

Now, as i sit down and take a moment… pause for a while… i realised that all these were not necessary… a chase after the wind… ME DUMB DUMB… Yes… DUMB DUMB IS ME!

Know what? I think i am sick and tired of the unknown, i am sick and tired of waiting for the time to come, for things to happen. I am sick and tired of being afraid of going too fast and end up on wrong directions. I am sick and tired of being afraid of snakes, sick and tired of a “steroids addict” personality…

I want to go back to where i was once fearless, to just take what i want and be what i want… to reply questions with “That’s God’s job not mine…”

I dunno when i pawned my courage and faith for fear and worries, i dunno how passion and focus was drowned by distractions and scepticism… but i want to redeemed them. Today, i think i saw the pawn shop closed, with a sign hanged on its gates. It said “ Pawn Shop closed. All items already redeemed by Jesus.”  :)

Time to come…

Time is an associate which i can never really tell if its a friend or foe, a companion that one can never shake off but altogether unfeeling and cold… Its like having someone walking with you, but yet this person does not slow down or stop when you take a fall or collapsed. Often we find ourselves chasing after time as soon as  when we gained our consciousness, or regained “sight”

These days, since back from Thailand, i have been bumming around grumpily… Unable to confirm or even plan, left me frustrated. And now here i am, suddenly awaken to find that time is so far ahead of me…

• Room – unpacked… still too much to not throw…
• Flights – booked… 5th for BKK and 8th for Hanoi…
• Hanoi – duration unknown… 1 mth tentative…
• US – Not sure if still going, or if i still wanna go…
• Luggage – unpacked… cos dunno how to pack for a trip that has no duration and destination…

Still… i look forward to God’s plan… what seems impossible for me now, will be his job to bring it to pass. He knows the thing in my heart, and he knows i dun have the heart to do it… too afraid to even mention abt it to anyone at all… My fren, wait with me ok… allow me to bring u good news,  good testimony.

Ps. Still very upset and angry and hurt that my mum STILL thinks that i going Vietnam is for fun… argh! my mum leh! :(  sigh…

Made pack meal for Sis…

Its 4am in the morning, and i had been on the phone for like 2hrs… U dun expect gourmet breakfast from a tired and sleepy person bah!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BIZARRE SATURDAY

Its been a strange start to my weekend… since Friday evening, i had to play host to a foreigner acquaintance. (Really cannot bring myself to call her as fren, simply cos she is not lor… i am just being technically correct that's all!) Anyway, i was told to expect another 2 person, who were suppose to be the staff from Cam Chan Guan, my dad’s restaurant.  But at the airport i was met with the foreigner, 1 male staff – a cook, and guess wat… A MONK! And they address him as SHI FU (MASTER). He was all dress in his monk-ly attire in dark brown. I cant help but have a O.o expression on my face, as non one did any explanation who he was and why he was here in this group that i am suppose to play host to.

The trip barely speaks English, but the acquaintance does manageable phrases for me to understand her; she is the comms personnel of the grp. Now, the obvious objective for this madam is SHOPPING, and the male staff/ the cook is the one who make the trip legitimate… sigh… Then there is the S F guy, he said he was here to visit temples…………… and shopping! He was visibly very excited alright. I wondered long and hard on wat shopping is he into… It din take long for me to figure out.

First things first, went thru the meeting with Mr David Ong and visited their catering kitchen… really interesting and impressed with the details they went into for the services they provided… can clearly see their pride. I’m glad i participated, and i hope some day i would be like them… beaming with pride as i introduce Cam Chan or even my own cafe in the near future. :)

After their kind reception, its to the temples! My first time into a temple actually… First stop, Si Ma Lu Guan Yin Temple… so much smoke really buay tahan! But the sea of worshippers stirred up something within me. Before we stepped in, our dear SF was lured to a stall… he wanted to buy a scripture chanting CD w music. The lady at the stall told us that, if SF wants she can give him discount cos he is a monk. And my acquaintance insisted that she pays for it.

Then after much looking ard in the temple, i scooted out… too much smoke for my liking. They proceeded with shopping… The lady was looking ard at clothes but kept saying not nice, or too expensive compared to States etc… argh… GRRR… Then the SF slips off to the beads section. My sis scooted off looking  at watches, so i had to try to be help with the comms. Bargaining took place, and … GRIN … i had to help the SF to buy 108 beads. The deal closed @ a price which i still think is  a rip off for some plastic, but they insisted it was crystal. And the SF was too attracted to the BLING BLING of the beads to wait for a further slash in price… OMG! SUPER BLING LOR! Question marks and exclamation marks were raining on my head like snow, but i kept to myself… If Christians like to wear nice cross, i guess monks are also entitled to BLING BLING chanting beads bah… :X

Next was the Burmese temple somewhere in/near Balestiar, thanks to the Heritage race that Dadi and gang roped me in, else i wont have a clue man… a nice place with plenty of photo taking for them… But it was a cow and horse sight when the Burmese and Vietnamese tried to communicate… hehehee…

We proceeded to shopping as requested, it was orchard road that we headed for. First Wisma Atrium then Taka; it was a trying time for me when they tested my patriotism but continuous sayings of SG no good, this too expensive think States or even Vietnam better, etc etc etc… Let me explain; 1) pekchek abt her complains abt sg no gd. 2) ask me bring them there then complain nothing here and nothing there. WOW LAU EH! wasted my time and parking lor… and some more kana fine lor…

Best way to calm one down is thru food; we then decided to have dinner. Our good frens say they wanna do food tasting, and told us to bring them to East Coast Long Beach. But seeing that the following day is Father’s Day, my sis and i exchanged looks when she insisted even after we warned her of long waiting time or no crabs/seafood. True to our suspicions, no parking and had to wait long long. Finally @ Long Beach, we were told crabs sold out. They were sorely disappointed, but i was glad… cos they had the same thing on previous nite and i am frightened by the frequent and amount they order lor. All i can say is, Long Beach @ East Coast standard dropped rock bottom. Shake head man… food sucks and price ex… totally not going back there at all. Think Jumbo is better.

Erm… forgot to mention, some credit for the SF, he was having vegan all the while. Poor fella sees all the nice and fanciful stuffs but he cant touch. But he does have a appetite though, the usual is 1 vegan fried rice, 1 vegan veggie dish, 1 vegan tofu dish and 1 vegan horfun. But i still dun think this amount of food justify his build, his build looks more like meat base build ley… hmm……

Anyway, i am just glad the bizarre sat went pass without getting too ugly. Dear God, thanks for showing me that i cannot be tour guide. From the bottom of my heart, i totally agree w you… no tour guiding for me!

*time to peng shan*

Hi… my name is dumb dumb, you can call me dumb numero 1.

Of scum and scams, was perhaps too strong to be used on the recent unpleasant experience my fren and I had encountered recently. But it was pretty amusing to see that THE LAND OF THOUSAND SMILES to be actually THE LAND OF THOUSAND SCAMS.

This recent vacation of mine was very different from the typical holiday in Thailand. Up north we headed for Chiang Mai and Chiang Rai… up into the hills/mountain of akha land; where we experience simple rural life of bugs, murky water in the sink, single daily transport to the city, power failure etc… Other than these, we enjoyed the visit to a village school, and were more aware of our good fortunes at home. We truly enjoyed our time up in akha hills… and who knows, we might be going back there again.

The service apartment we had in Bangkok was great, it was like re-living my days working overseas. I left my grief and anger there, and the breeze took them, the swimming pool took them… I have always tried to make the best out of situations and this time should not be any different.

As for the scams thing, I rest it in God’s hand. I just do what I can do, and leave the rest to the pro to handle it… God will handle it for me. It’s sad that time after time I am reminded that there is no trust in ppl, between strangers… between fellow countrymen, between associates and colleagues, between friends, and even between family members… This is a crappy world that malfunctions big time, I guess it needs Yahwah all the more…

“The Land of Thousand Scams”.

Dear Sir,

We would like to seek your kind assistance in obtaining refunds for gem purchases made in Bangkok, as we believe we are victims of a gem scam.

It happened on 4th June 2009. We had just arrived in Bangkok, waiting for the night train to travel up to Chiang Mai. Our plans were to visit the National Museum, the "Sitting Buddha" statues, and other tourist attractions in Bangkok.

When we arrived at the National Museum, we found notices put up at the entrance. A kind Thai man told us that the Royal family had come to visit, and therefore the place was closed. We were then directed to a gem selling place by him, and there was supposed to be a one day only gem export promotion.

The name of the gem company is Erawan Lapidary, and the salesman who greeted us was named Roy. We were told that all their gems were genuine quality products, and came with certifications of authenticity. My friend and I each bought a sapphire gem set, which consisted of a pair of sapphire ear rings, a ring and a pendant, all in gold setting. The price of these items was 52,000 baht per set.

Upon returning home, we happily presented these gifts to our mothers only to disappoint them when someone pointed out that the gems were of very inferior quality. We had them checked at the local jewellery shop, and they confirmed our fears. These gem sets we have now are not genuine quality products which was promised to us.

Subsequently, we did some research on the internet and found out that many had fallen to similar scams over the last 5-10 years. Sadly, none of them was publicised to educate and warn the public. It would sadden many to learn that “The Land of Thousand Smiles” is actually more like “The Land of Thousand Scams”.

We are dismayed to know that many people are involved in this scam, and they are doing it openly in public. Thus, we have decided to relate our unpleasant experience to the general public through the media. We hope to create an awareness of such scams, so as to prevent more people from falling into them, and stop these scammers from flourishing at the expense of the ignorant public.

We would like to seek your help to get a full refund for our purchases. I can make a personal trip down to Bangkok to bring the gems back for refund and log a report with the Thai tourist police if necessary.

I deeply appreciate if you can get back to me on the next course of action.

Benjamin's letter

For what it's worth: it's never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it.

And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of. If you find that you're not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.

End of one, beginning of another...

One of my greatest joy, was the excitement i had @ the end of 2008, and the beginning of 2009; where much anticipation of good change...

Another overwhelming joy was from my best friend, who ended their 12yrs long of relationship in matrimony... where now, she takes it her first priority to marry me off as well... forming the awsome trio "tai tai" grp... (argh)

Within 2 weeks, was the demise of my grandma... it was a news which i dreaded, since the day i had left to work overseas. I blamed myself for many things, but none of it changed anything. This is one blow that had me sprawling on the ground still... The disappointments that came after, only left anger in me... and all my family can see in me, is anger.

After 3 brief weeks, i left my company... a job which i had loved and gave all for the past 8yrs and 5 mths. The sad truth for leaving was, i couldnt stand the job any longer... Each morning was a dread for the last 2 yrs... Its time something is to be done.

Its scary; to step out of something so familiar, where you think yr capabilities are... Especially when the recent events had not been a smooth passage. I hadnt had a change to think, rather... i refused to start thinking... i have this plan, but i dun seems to like this plan... but its the only plan i have...

God will lead... rite?

^ _ ^

Hebe's take on 華麗上班族之生存與生活

星期日趕上在台北最後一場華麗上班族之生存與生活
一開始並不清楚是怎樣的一個故事
總覺得上班族? 我不是上班族….我是上班族?...共鳴…?
但因為聽到是張艾嘉自編自演的舞台劇
就先訂了票 把自己推進戲院
只能說 咻~還好..我有訂票

舞台設計得很簡單很棒
在導演的空間安排下 巧妙十足
是一階階的階梯 由下往上
好像就象徵著人一旦被丟入社會 進入職場
就沒得選擇的只能一階一階的向上爬 否則就是被一步一步的往下拉 向下踩
真的是一部笑裡藏刀的悲喜劇
看完這齣劇被迫面對社會 職場的殘酷
很不舒服
我想 真正在職場上的上班族應該更有感觸吧
劇中每個角色都會出現在你身邊
每句台詞都針針見血
把辦公室裡爭權奪利 相互撕咬的真面目血淋淋的體現
提醒著每個人是否還記得當初手中握有的理想
還是握著的早已變成慾望了?
不自覺得被貪婪侵蝕的體無完膚了?


這應該是第一次欣賞以自己母語演出的舞台劇
很直接的感受到演員的每個情緒 每個悲喜 每一句台詞
別於電影 震撼力加倍
即便我的座位離舞台很遠 看不清楚演員的表情
但是情緒貼得很近 好幾度雞皮疙瘩一直出風頭
張艾嘉 真的是張艾嘉 不是張學友(好啦 我很白吃 你們儘管罵我)
王耀慶….硬到打不碎的硬底子演員
要在劇場演戲的演員真的很厲害
一演下來就是三小時
每場戲的情緒轉換之快 又收放自如
扎實的演技
令人感動

謝幕的時候 我不停止的讓我雙手的掌紋貼合又張開 貼合又張開
鼓勵他們的努力 鼓勵他們帶給我的 鼓勵我自己還沒出現在劇中的任何一個角色
感謝我是享受生活 享受工作
而不是爲了生存

你呢? 如果是為了生存
我祝福你步步高升 但願你行正途 取之有道 達到理想

Love & Grief

Love is taking out your heart and leaving it at the mercy of that party,
regardless if its family, frens or the opposite gender.
And getting hurt is inevitable...

Not all wounds are intentional,
but all pain are the real...

Grief is a wound,
that is invisible to the eye,
and temporally numb at times...
But once you check on the wound,
u'll be surprise at the magnitude of the pain.

She's gone...

she's gone,
she left her body,
that empty shell is not her!

Dramatic morning
Confusion,
tears, more tears, even more tears
eyes swollen and painful
headache from weeping
lost...

i cant speak of wat hap,
so i din inform anyone,
except for the ppl whom i asked to pray...
and i had to call Lian...

That call clear most of my system,
suddenly woken

still dunno wat to do,
wait and see tmw.

One two three...

One two three,
dun run from me...
Come tell me,
all that you see...

My eyes are weak,
and my sight has dimmed,
barely barely can i see...
Would you bring some light to me?

Keo Oi, chúc mừng sinh nhật!

Before the strike to 12, i want to wish my dear fren a BLESSED BIRTHDAY again... i have no idea when exactly we started to celebrate her birthday together, but i am extremely glad to participate .... :)

I still cannot get over the "she was my fren's fren... but now she is my good fren..." where is that other fren? i dunno :(  It happens, and i have long learnt that, no matter who is beside you now, they will take on a path of their own... its not selfish, its something they must do and go...

In the frantic of gathering a surprise for her, i hadnt the time to really sit down and write something to her... So here goes :

想让你今年的生日热闹一点， 想让你有被好友围绕你而不孤单的感觉， 希望你有快乐一点， 希望你的心有那么一点点地微笑 - 真心的微笑。。。 明年的你我不知道会在哪里， 跟什么人过。。。 但你这个朋友太难忘记；所以无论你人在哪，或我们还有没有联络， 你会一直 in my prayers! :)

me???

◎您是智慧的寶劍，可攻可守，有勇有謀，充滿誠信與義氣，喜歡有禮貌，有智慧的人。有主導權與領導能力，對於現狀的不滿，能勇於突破。◎
根據命理來分析您的個性，潛意識，以及行為模式，您是屬於「寶劍命」，因此您天生具有寶劍的特質，有魄力、義氣，與霸氣。您也十分有才幹與領導能力，富有公平心與正義感，喜歡保護弱小，不喜歡恃強凌弱，受人恩惠，必定回報，不願意辜負別人，也不願意占人便宜。寶劍雖然外在感覺比較強勢，但內心卻很溫暖，吃軟不吃硬。寶劍銳利無比，因此您對於現狀的不滿，能勇於突破，抗衡壓力，改變環境，掌握自己的命運，但是寶劍有時後使用不當，也會傷到自己人，因此您有時候會太過積極，造成身邊的人過大的壓力。
此外，您喜歡有聰明智慧，才華創意的人，不喜歡懦弱沒有擔當的人，而能讓您佩服的人，多半是有領袖特質，能夠犧牲奉獻，講求公平正義的人。您的一生，像寶劍一樣，但是要成為真正的寶劍，寒光射天地，劍氣沖斗牛，是需要經過反覆的淬煉。沒有經過淬煉的寶劍，只能成為廢鐵。然而要經過淬煉，需要有浴火鳳凰的精神，不怕痛苦與磨難，只要您經得起外在的考驗，不怨天尤人，進而學習成長，一旦通過考驗，您的成就將不可限量，是領袖級的人物，風雨不能影響您，困難不能障礙您，成為不敗的常勝軍。

◎您本命五行土太旺，胃腸機能比較弱，容易有腹脹，腹痛，腹瀉，消化吸收的問題。◎
根據命理分析，您天生胃腸功能比較弱，在年輕的時候不會有太大的問題，等多是腸胃不適、胃酸過多、脹氣、腹瀉、腹痛等問題，但是如果您現在不照顧消化系統，隨著年紀越來越大就很容易導致消化系統病變，例如食道炎，胃炎、胃潰瘍、腸炎、大腸息肉、痔瘡、糖尿病等問題。因此您不能過度勞累，要調適壓力，維持正常作息，早睡早起，三餐要定時定量，不能喝酒，少吃刺激性飲食，才可以保護先天比較弱的胃腸功能。
此外，所謂「病從口入」，人類大部分的疾病來源都跟飲食有關，根據中醫理論，食物可以分成金、木、水、火、土等五種五行。您可能偏好吃各種甜食或甜點，因此，您的細胞中，充滿太多「土」的五行，會導致健康，財運與事業的不圓滿，建議您平時最好能飲食均衡，菜色均衡，則陰陽五行調和，生活美滿幸福。

◎但是您八字缺木，肝膽機能也比較弱，容易疲累，體力差，要注意膽固醇，三酸甘油酯的問題。◎
根據命理分析，您天生肝膽功能比較差，所以容易感覺疲倦，體力似乎不如人，因此無法從事需要大量勞力的工作。在年輕的時候不會有太大的問題，頂多是肝火旺盛，長青春痘，容易煩躁等問題，但隨著年紀越來越大，肝膽功能需要更多的照顧，不然很容易有膽固醇、三酸甘油酯的問題，甚至容易導致免疫功能衰退、肝功能異常、脂肪肝、肝硬化、膽結石、膽囊息肉、青光眼、白內障或視力病變等問題。因此您不能過度勞累，而且千萬不能喝酒，要維持正常作息，早睡早起，才可以保護先天比較弱的肝膽功能。
此外，您在晚上會比白天更有精神，工作也比較有靈感，效率也比較高，所以您容易晚睡晚起，早睡早起對您比較好，雖然不容易做到，但是會對您的命運有很大的幫助。此外，您不太願易得罪人，也不願意當第一位，老二哲學比較適合您。如果您想改變這種現象，一定要戒酒，喝酒會讓您的運勢低落，體能衰退。如果您能養成早睡早起的好習慣，再配合早晨去公園運動，那您的命運將會有很大的改變，身體健康，財運順利，事業圓滿，家庭幸福。

◎簡易愛情分析，您是屬於比較強勢的太太。您的愛情不是屬於濃情密意的那一型，他比較沒主見，而您比較有智慧，在未來的感情路上，您們會遇到許多溝通上的問題，需要您們以智慧與包容來一一克服。◎
您愛情的模式，根據命理分析，您對於在生命中出現的異性，不太容易心動，您的眼光有點高，因此除非對象很完美，內外在美兼具，氣質儀表出眾，還要有深度，您才會心動。這類型的男生是世間稀有，如果有，早就被別人追走了。因此，您容易感嘆得不到真愛，尋常的愛情您也不容易珍惜。一般來說，您是具有深度的人，異性對您的第一印象都不會太深，需要經過交往的階段，異性才會發現您的氣質、優點與內在美。換句話說，您的戀愛對象不容易第一眼就喜歡上您，卻很可能經過長時間相處而喜歡上您。相反地，您很容易第一眼就確定喜不喜歡一個人。因此，如果您在等待美好的愛情，您可以試著把自己的內在美透過各種方式表現出來，多參加各種活動，多培養各種興趣，多接觸不同人群，如此您會在不知不覺中，讓您的內在美隨時展現，愛情才會更順利。
在人生的旅程中，您對於愛情有點挑剔，因此在生命的河流中，要碰到兩情相悅，並擦出愛的火花並不是那麼容易，但卻也不是那麼難，您和愛人的戀情最容易在變遷時發生，例如工作變動，生涯轉換，或進入一個新環境，或參加陌生的活動。離開您熟悉的環境，讓您感覺到缺乏熟悉事物的保護時，才容易卸下您的心防，並且發生新戀情。至於，結婚的對象，因為您會比較注重精神層次，因此您很有可能會晚婚。若是您到現在，對象還沒有出現，您身邊認識的人中，最談得來、個性最相合，或一直守在您身邊的那一位可能就是您的對象了，只要您真心誠意給對方一點暗示，幸福就在您身邊。

◎簡易事業分析，您的工作類型大部分都需要思考，從事一些靜態的工作。這類型的工作，需要有才華，有理想，能專心，以心靈為導向。◎
每一個行業中都有不同的職位，而您的工作類型，不論在哪一個行業中發展，大部分都需要思考，從事一些靜態的工作。例如，行政管理，市場行銷，文化藝術，學術研究，發明創造，宗教哲學，非營利事業等偏向靜態的工作。這類型的工作，需要有才華，有理想，能專心，以心靈為導向。如果您選擇從事這類型工作，您會比較順利，輕鬆，也更能發揮所長。但是世界上跟您一樣有天份的人很多，唯有不斷進步才有無可取代的價值。
另外，您的工作類型容易產生下列迷思。一、喜歡思考的人容易沉浸在自己的世界，一般人不容易進入您的內心，所以會比較孤獨寂寞。二、喜歡思考的人缺乏執行力，容易說得多做得少。三、喜歡思考的人不喜歡爭名奪利，不容易經由競爭而成功，但可以經由等待而成功。此外，對於其他工作領域，像是績效導向的工作，協調整合的工作，領導統馭的工作，或體力勞動的工作，都是您比較不適合的工作類型，您會覺得乏味無趣，不願意做，也做不久。

◎簡易財運分析，您不容易守財，您有很多的愛好與興趣，也比較注重生活品質，您對於相關的花費不會吝嗇，因此您使用過的金錢才是您的財富。◎
根據命理分析，您不容易守財，您有很多的愛好與興趣，因此您對於跟自己愛好與興趣相關的花費不會吝嗇。您也比較注重生活品質，因此對於提升居住品質，或營造心靈品質的花費也不吝嗇。您的個性也不容易拒絕別人，所以身邊經常有很多情況需要花錢，就算您手頭比較緊，該花的錢您還是會花。一旦您手頭比較寬裕，您花錢起來會更大方，正因為如此，您當然不容易存錢。如果以一生的時間來衡量，您今生大部份的財富會被您拿來做自己想做的事情，您會認為您使用過的金錢才是您真正擁有的財富。之後，您不會遺留太多的財富給後代子孫。

Much Ado About Nothing

Presented by SRT Mainstage
Fort Canning Park
From 7 May 2009

Love, laughter, madness and mayhem.

‘Shakespeare in the Park’ returns this May with one of the greatest comedies of all time.

Sumptuous costumes, a spectacular set, music, dancing, word play and laughter come together to make a joyful night. Bring a picnic basket and blanket and lie under the stars as the park comes to life like you have never seen before.

In 2007, over 20,000 people came to SRT’s landmark production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream at Fort Canning Park. This year’s Much Ado About Nothing promises to be even more fun.

Whether you want to enjoy a wonderful romantic comedy, be part of a historic event, or just have a picnic, this will be a spectacular evening for young and old.

As war-weary soldiers return home, sparks fly as a battle of love commences.

At the wealthy Leonato’s house, the beautiful young Hero catches the eye of Claudio, a handsome soldier.  They fall in love at first sight and rush headlong into marriage, but they still have a lot to learn about each other.  There is no such hurry for confirmed singletons Beatrice and Benedick, whose scorn for love and love of bickering inspire their scheming friends to plot them a happy ending.

A hilarious showdown between the sexes unfolds in Shakespeare's dark and dazzling romantic comedy.

Directed by Edward Dick
Directed the hugely successful tour of Romeo and Juliet for Shakespeare's Globe as well as A Midsummer Night's Dream for the Sydney Theatre Company. He also directed Twelfth Night for Regent’s Park Open Air Theatre.
Starring (in alphabetical order)
Adrian Pang (MediaCorp Artiste) with Jason Chan, Michael Corbidge, Wendy Kweh and Julie Wee.

You And Me

what day is it
and in what month
this clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up
and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time

cause it's you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to lose
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

all of the things that I want to say
just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping inwards
you got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

cause it's you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to prove
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

there's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
everything she does is beautiful
everything she does is right

you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to lose
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to prove
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

what day is it
and in what month
this clock never seemed so alive

WEE HOURS OF 02 MAR 2009

I HAD A GREAT TIME AT GOLF EARLIER IN THE MORNING.

I ENJOYED MY TEOCHEW MUI LUNCH AT MY FAV STALL.

I ENJOYED AN EMPTY HOUSE WITH A COLD BEER FOR TEA TIME.

I FELL ASLEEP WHILE WAITING FOR MY SISTER TO COME BACK FOR DINNER...

I WOKE UP AT 2300HRS.

NOW I AM HUNGRY... CAN I EAT U?

 

GRIN.....

In midst of sleeplessness

I have been very bless since the day i was born... i had the love of both paternal and maternal grandparents, and of cos my parents... In the chinese culture, grandfathers of my generation are usually man of few words, but plenty of unfriendly written all over their faces... But my sister and i had been exceptions in our family, for both father's and mother's side... in their own subtle ways......

I am very proud to recount the days when my paternal grandparents fussed abt me... My grandma has to flash out her teaching status to get me into the MPCC kindegarten, and TNS... My grandma was SUPER COOL! Then there was my grandpa who was all excited to give me 10mins briefing for my 1st day in kindergarten... The whole 10mins were actually 3 instructions: 1. If ppl beat u, PUNCH THEM BACK IN THE FACE. 2. If they beat you back again, PUNCH THEM BACK AGAIN. 3. If they cry, PUNCH THEM AGAIN. LOLx... my grandpa also very cool rite! kakaka...

Of all my cousins in my father's side, my grandma said grandpa loved my sis and most... becos we were exactly like our dad, who in turn was exactly like himself... We were suppose to learn calligraphy and chinese ink from him, cos that was his life, but lessons barely started he was diagnosed with a condition that required a minor operation. Grandpa and Dad made a pact to give up smoking after the operation, and i was super happy... but it nv had chance to come to pass...

My maternal grandparents were hardy and tough ppl, such that my grandpa looks like he is going to eat u any time... But yet this taxi man was quite a romantic; he actually surprised my grandma on afternoon by no going to his shift but fetched her to fetch me from TNS. Mind you they not young hor... and i was primary 1 bah... kekeke That's not all, he then brought us to see movie at republic cinema and have tim sum after the show. hahahaha WHOLE FAMILY WAS STUNNED TO HEAR TAT LOR! And i was there to testify for him. :)

In my short biz venture, I remembered how much pride he was wearing on his face when i told him i want to bring him to my internet cafe to drink kopi... Of cos, he declined in a LOUD way... cos i was making 3-in-1, saying instant kopi sucks. He complained tat i shld learn to make the traditional kopi from grandma, after all we are descendants kopitiam owners... Then the venture fell thru when my partner decides to pull stunts on me. I was very sad, but i guess my grandpa was too... cos i nv did have the chance to bring him down to see the place in the whole 6mths... Not longer after, he too fell ill and passed on...

I hated my complicated family issues, and preferred to stay away from my uncles and aunts, but i love my grandparents...

Tots that crept into my mind

I was instructed to attend a leadership training course, and though it was boringly uninteresting, some information that the trainer shared actually left and impression...

The first that caught my attention was how our brains do not understand the word "DON'T" ...... Here's an example, try to follow my instructions...

>>>DO NOT aka DONT think about the number 7 now.

You are thinking of the number now, aren't you? Instead of not thinking about the subject, its was all the more magnified than before... The more we dun try to do something the more attention it is getting thus leading to a greater probability that we will do it...

Another impressionable note was the question-less experience during the course... He totally whacked us with this statement, "For every question that you ask, you already have the answer." We were dumbfounded... but still i do doubt the integrity of that answer within... have an answer... YES, but correct anot???

The answers from within are usually the based upon past experiences, perceptions and the education/information imparted to us. If the past experience or perception or even the education/information was inaccurate, then how? I really do not think anyone would have the ultimate correct answer... other than God himself.

One last note for today... in the midst of my indecisiveness, i am going to rest in the decision i made... since i made it and i am going to stick by it... I am nervous, but i am not worried... strange but thats that..... a kiwi i am in the year 2009!

华丽上班族之生活与生存

This is definitely the best performance i had seen so far, rather than telling you what the story is depicting, i find that its more important and interesting on how it came about and into a performance of existance. This is a short extract of their promo event .

Steven Curtis Chapman - I Will Be Here

Tomorrow morning if you wake up
And the sun does not appear
I, I will be here
If in the dark we lose sight of love
Hold my hand and have no fear
'Cause I, I will be here

I will be here
When you feel like being quiet
When you need to speak your mind
I will listen
And I will be here
When the laughter turns to crying
Through the winning, losing and trying
We'll be together
'Cause I will be here

Tomorrow morning if you wake up
And the future is unclear
I, I will be here
As sure as seasons are made for change
Our lifetimes are made for years
So I, I will be here

I will be here
And you can cry on my shoulder
When the mirror tells us we're older
I will hold you
And I will be here
To watch you grow in beauty
And tell you all the things you are to me
I will be here

I will be true to the promise I have made
To you and to the One who gave you to me

I will be here
And just as sure as seasons are made for change
Our lifetimes are made for years
So I, I will be here
We'll be together
I will be here

Love Song

I've heard it said that a man would climb a mountain
Just to be with the one he loves
How many times has he broken that promise
It has never been done.
I've never climbed the highest mountain
But I walked the hill of calvary

Chorus
Just to be with you, I'd do anything
There's no price I would not pay
Just to be with you, I'd give anything
I would give my life away.

I've heard it said that a man would swim the ocean
Just to be with the one he loves
How may times has he broken that promise
It can never be done
I've never swam the deepest ocean
But I walked upon the raging sea

(Repeat chorus)

(Bridge)
I know that you don't understand
the fullness of My love
How I died upon the cross for your sins
And I know that you don't realize
how much that I gave you
But I promise, I would do it all again.
Just to be with you, I've done everything
There's no price I did not pay
Just to be with you, I gave everything
Yes, I gave my life away.

                                                                                  - Third Day

Another dream

It just came to my mind that i had another "interesting" dream ystd, i guess i can categorize it to be in the science fiction section... Let me see how much i can recall, after all its really not tat fresh in my mind any more......

It started with something happened... and someone was being pursued... then it complicated me and i started to run for my dear life... somehow we knew there was a escape route and we heading for the bathroom and locked ourselves in it. As the door was being locked, someone sort of opened a portal by stepping on a small round circular pad. One step on the thing with the left foot and then the person goes a portal! The thing happened real fast so abt 5 of us got thru the thing real quick, that we din even hear the pursuers opening or banging on the bathroom door.

Think that was the end of the adrenaline pumping excitement, but it wasn't the end of the dream. Cant remember what happen after reaching the other end of the portal, but it was somewhere safe bah. I only rem that i went thru the portal another 2 times, with the last time going into an apartment... It was a beautiful place where no one was ard. I knew it wasn't my place for sure, cos i sort of was enjoying the apartment when the owner is not ard. And i kinda think that i would jump into the portal when the owner is back... other than that i was enjoying the place as my own...

Sadly... the dream ends with me waking up in my reality portal... my bed.