Mistakenly disappointed......

Its been quite sometime since i last told ppl ard me that i'm am overjoyed that my boss think's that i am capable of more at work, and they would like to recommend me for a promotion. Its been like dunno how long and i have already forgotten abt the July annoucement date.

And just when i was thinking abt it on my way to work, in the cab... this voice asked me,
"Its july now, isnt the promtion news suppose to be out since its already like mid of the mth?"
Another voice in me replied,"Yea, most prob is the promotion thing din come thru, though they promised at least a grade jump and will fight for 2 grade jump, but u shld know why..."
ANd i replied to these to voices," yea i know, performance has been rock bottom since the day boss mentioned abt proposing my name for promo to the board." I shrugged off the tot abt the promo thing altogether. I was determine to maintain the cheery me, the one month overseas assignment that allowed me to focus only on 1 project really gave me some rest. I was feeling fresh and ready to start work.

As usual, the computer gives me some of her attitude treatment for giving her cold shoulder for a mth. Everything got back on track after some struggling with the hdd, email transfer and the non-stop ringing crazed phone finally shut up, giving me sometime to sort out all the arrows that were shooting at me. Then the computer "rang", an incoming email... The first few lines read,
"Congrats to those mentioned in the attached list." It's the name list of those whose promotion have been approved by the board and managers. I quickly closed the email window and tagged the email under "unread", cos i really dun dare to read... dun wanna to be affected by it my name isnt in it.... dun wan my working engine to clutter when it jus got warmed up...

Nearing 5pm, my neigboring colleague exclaimed aloud that the promo list is out, he was all excited. To disguise my nervousness, i commented "Yea! cool rite?!! time to have free lunch again!!!" However, the uncool part was, i caught a glimpse of the list and it really didnt look like it had my name. On the spot, disappointment battered me.

But then i told myself that its ok, everyone knows that i have worked hard and they do know that there is much more i can accomplish. The only prob now lies in me who is not showing it, not giving my boss enuff ammo to fight for me. I had been such a diffcult person in the last few mths and everyone not only kept showing concern and patience in me, but also keep coming to talk to me and telling me how much they like me to share watever probs i am facing. Guess my attitude was so horrundous that ppl can tell me that i dun seems to be the June they know.
As i went on abt my work after that glance, i tried to keep my spirits up but the impact of disappointment is hard to just shove it away.

At abt 6.30pm, still buried in my work, someone shouted for me. i replied with a good strong reply of "YES SIR!". *HEHEE* Dunno why work until so high also... but it seems as i have more stuffs to do, the more i can put myself into it. "SO EXCITING! GOT ALOT OF WORK TO DO! I LOVE IT!!!!" This phrase seems to be written all over my face, thats how my colleague described me today. Anyway, back to the fellow who called for me. He excitedly called me over, refusing my request for uno minuto... i scrambled over and his pointed to the computer screen, its was the promo list, i fely my heart dipped a little and wanted to turn away ASAP. But then when i look at the spot where his finger landed, i saw my name... I SAW MY NAME..... MY NAME ON THE LIST... THE LIST!!! I was already smiling boradly in my heart, but still i had to ask them if they are sure and if they had altered the list... Then it was confirmed...

Now to think back, i realized that my boss who had been trying to contact me was trying to tell me that my promo went through but not as the one planned. So it was not to tell me that i din get the promo! hahaha... i am OVERJOYED! Though the promotion was in the grading and in $$$ sense its really very peanuts, but its enuff to set me smiling.